Well Someone Has To Say It...

What If It Is You?

Autism. It is a condition that is plaguing our nation, but the condition itself is not the purpose of this blog. I know I am going to step on some toes with this blog. This post is about me venting on the parenting style of one person and questioning their behavior and how it affects the children involved.

Discipline is not a new concept in our society. Over the years the delivery is what has changed. Spankings have turned to grounding and has become a source of many controversies. Whether it is new standards and laws or belief systems that state spanking and other discipline is wrong, with time more and more parents opt not to spank their children. I personally understand the reasons why it has become less frequent due to so many taking it too far. There is not a set standard or guideline and the line between correct and just too far are very gray; however, I also understand the importance of discipline and spanking done right.

Now I am sure you are wondering what this has to do with Autism and the reason for this post. Someone very dear to me has been diagnosed with Autism. Do I believe he is? Yes, to an extent; however, I also believe it is partially how he is being raised and disciplined. Children will do whatever you let them get away with doing. Being a parent requires that you pay attention and be aware. As a parent you look at all faucets of things instead of just one side.

The incident: the child had his hands around his neck in a chocking manner. Was he showing us what the boy had done to him the previous night? Yes. What doesn't add up is when the parent tells me he has been doing that for days. And you let him?! You are going to get testy with me when I tell you I discouraged this behavior, because "He isn't squeezing or applying pressure." How are you to know what kind of pressure he is applying? What if he was to fall while doing so? Do you really want to teach him that it is okay to put his hands around his neck? The next step could be putting his hands around some one's neck.

This is a child that is known to play very roughly. He could easily be applying a strong amount of pressure and could harm himself. Throughout all of last year he had trouble in school with various things. Aggression and attention span was one of them. Could it be that the way you are parenting your child is why he is having such issues? He is known to be aggressive with other children and people. Yet as soon as you come in the house you demand he go to his room away from you and everyone else? You will not allow him to be outside to play due to the behave of himself and others. Socializing him in a controlled manner is what I see needs to be done. A child left to his own discretion will certainly not behave properly when he has never been taught otherwise. Do not even get me started on the other two children you have!

As a parent myself, I question what is going on behind those doors when I am not around if this is how you choose to act in my presence. These are children of which were like my own. I raised the oldest for close to the first year of his life. My heart is breaking as I write this. I know when I speak to you myself it falls on deaf ears. I know there is not much I can do, but your child deserves more help, attention, and guidance. Nothing can change unless you change yourself and your path first. You cannot expect your child to learn what you do not teach him.